The count-down has begun. On Thursday the 30th of Sep at 18.00 GMT+1 at Klosterøya in Skien you can sign up to attend what I believe will be the most exciting 45 min training session you've ever experienced + get a signed copy of the 3E book. If you'd like to participate online, this too is possible.

"The 3 Energies Behind Sales Success" has the following message on the back of its cover:

								Success a Bi-product of Excellence In one form or another we all want something in life. That something or someone is how we tend to define success. However, success or what we get is only a bi-product of excellence. In other words, whenever we succeed it was because we reached an excellent or superior position in relation to what we want. Something happened that attracted the desired outcome, and that something is excellence. Therefore, what we really want is excellence; a state of mind or condition that naturally turns every surrounding force or person into an ally. Excellence on Three Levels The essence of excellence is effective communication on three levels. These three levels or energies dramatically affects your influence. We can influence people and circumstances, but it is by how we change ourselves that our capacity to influence increases. This will help you become a better spouse, father, mother, friend and neighbor. In short, 3E will not only enhance your sales talent, but also make you a better leader.
								Sign up now!

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

Today I watched an excellent clip produced by RSAnimate based on a talk by Daniel Pink. It describes some of the essence behind The WHY Questions: How people are driven by autonomy, mastery and purpose, rather than money when the task at hand is complicated, when it requires conceptual and creative thinking.

I recommend watching this 10 minute video. There's not a dull moment - promise!

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

Clients, just like small children and toddlers, have a crying engine that sometimes needs to run for a while before we reach the heartier matters - the stuff that really makes a difference and that defines customer needs. It's not necessarily logical, but it certainly is psychological.

Did you ever witness a child crying for a long time? And then, when you offer your comfort and help, the child is simply unable to stop crying for quite a while. Even several minutes after the crying has "officially" stopped, the child is still experiencing periodic and uncontrolled sobbing. This phenomenon is what I refer to as "the crying engine".

		Do You Remember? Of course, we've all been that child who cries, too, haven't we? Think about it; just how does serious and deep crying feel? Are you able to recall the feeling? When you're crying that intensely and that long the hurt is deep down. It's almost as if it slowly moves down from head and tears to the heart and chest. So much so that it starts aching and kind of stiffens your chest. Then, to bring yourself out of it again the pain needs to return the same way up. And it just takes time, doesn't it?

Crying Remains the Same

What does this have to do with influence and sales?

Grown-ups are experiencing much of the same feelings in many ways. We may not frequently let it all out in as easily a recognizable pattern as public crying, but the process and the pain is exactly the same. Effective sales people allow the client to go through that process - gently - both the growing awareness of pain moving down to the heart as well as the resolving of deep feelings of hurt and disappointment moving up and out. The concluding result is wonderful. The other person experiences great relief, which is a reward in itself, I feel! The bonus is that your odds of making a sale quadruples, if not much more.

Mind you, the old school of "problem and pain questions" is a solid and good one, but supposing that all customers need help like that is of course taking it much too far and will only lead to miscommunication in so many cases. This is one of several good reasons why of all the different sales systems I appreciate the flexible approach of "Helping Clients Succeed" by Franklin Covey so much.

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

"If you tell me WHAT to do, I may do it for you. If you help me understand WHY I should do it, I'll want to do it and get it done, much better". The WHY makes all the difference. Why then, if WHY is so important, do leaders tend to forget its importance?

Every time I do training, coaching or any kind of work to improve a company's performance I see the same crucial principle at work: Unless individuals see and understand the WHY, no lasting improvement ever takes place. However, when WHY is clear, dramatic change can occur, sometimes even instantly and without resistance. WHY seems to be the redeeming element of effective training - the ultimate source of motivation.

A repeated flaw in leadership is forgetting to focus on individual perspective. When leaders try to make a significant difference, they mostly make their appeal to the masses. Thus, they forget that lasting change of habits and patterns is highly personal. We don't change groups of people as much as we change individual behavior. Help one person see the picture and you're well on your way to actually improve an entire organization.

I witness both types of leaders every day and it's fairly easy to spot the difference between them. When leaders are personal and stick to individual follow up they are able to move large corporations. When they don't, they fail and fail miserably. Stay personal. Work one-on-one as well as with the larger group. Inspire change in that one individual. When you win the heart of the one, it gradually opens the door to everyone else.

Make a Big Difference So if you want to make a big difference, at least three energies are indispensable to getting results. Each energy has a principle attached that guides our efforts in becoming a change agent among people:

(1) Ask WHY / WHAT

Action: Ignite Passion by going one-on-one => inner conviction.

Passion is the energy that makes a person unstoppable. It lights up when WHY and WHAT becomes clear. Ask yourself the simple but tough questions: "Why am I doing what I do?" and "What am I about?"

(2) Ask WHO

Action: Make the Connection by executing plans together => shared conviction.

Connection is the energy that bonds us and causes us to succeed together. It brings a spark to every meaningful relationship when it becomes clear WHO matters most to us. Ask yourself the simple but tough questions: "Who is most important to me?" or "Who will give their all to the same mission as I have?".

(3) Ask HOW

Action: Stimulate Intuition by allowing individual freedom => discovered conviction.

Intuition is the energy that brings out the best in us. It shows the way in much the same way as our conscience. Individual answers will come to each of us as we deeply ask ourselves "How should I do this?" or "How can I best apply my talents and my style to solve these challenges?".

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

Life will bring you dark moments. It hurts to go through them, but when you're proactive bright times will dominate your life and can in fact jumpstart your path to success. To a person in sales, with a lot of regular setbacks, this is an important lesson to be learned and can become a lifestyle that will make all the difference.

Yesterday was an awful day for me. Just terrible! In addition, I lost a major contract I expected to close. Everything I had scheduled was headed toward success.

However, not only did I fail miserably, but people and circumstances gave me clear feedback about mistakes I had made. If you're like me; I can live with failure because it's what success is all about, but making mistakes is ten times worse. It's personal and hurts more than failure.

	So I was feeling low! When I came home I worked hard to get deeply involved in the life of my family members, replacing my concern for self with that of others. I decided I wouldn't even try to "get over it" until I'd had a good night's rest. Why? Because I know how it works. Here's how:

Did you ever find that when you look back on life, memories are mostly the happy ones. For some reason, most people tend to forget the dark moments, but savour the bright one's. In sum, all the happy moments appear to the mind as long and enduring bright times. (That's why we sometimes are inclined to think: "I used to be so happy, but now everything's so hard...")

So what can we learn from our ability to filter out the dark moments? How can this help us improve our lives on a daily basis?

Maintain Energy and Momentum

When you're experiencing a dark moment, accept it. Don't fight it. Strong and bad emotions are necessary opposites in a happy life. Let it pass by not making any serious or rash decisions. Close your mouth if you're tempted to take it out on the people around you. Listen more. Get involved in the lives of others and most importantly, retire early and let the body and mind rest it out.

Remember, late night moments are literally in the dark. If you retire early they will not last long. (During the night, your mind will be searching for answers and often find them, sometimes without you knowing it. Let the mind do the work for you.) In stead of extending the day - and the pain - by burning the midnight oil, rather choose to arise early and spend as much of your waking hours in the (day)light. It's a lifestyle that maintains your energy level and increases your momentum. The people around you will be surprised by your ability to get back up so soon after having taken such a serious beating, believe me!

Inevitably, dark moments will occur, however brief they might be, but bright times and feelings of happiness can and will dominate your life, now, not only in the past, if you want it to.

p.s. I'm well aware of chronic illnesses and serious depression, for which there certainly is no quick fix. What we're talking about here, though, is the tendency of any "healthy" person to sink into depression over matters that will evaporate if only you apply the principles outlined above.

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

Greater influence brings you faster to where you want to go. Passion is the definitive first step to greater influence. To a greater or lesser degree Passion lies in every positive change you ever saw. How can you tell how much Passion you've got? It's something people keep asking me. That's why this time I'd like to highlight three traits of Passion that seem to surface in successful individuals.

Passion, Connection and Intuition are the three components of influence.

Since Passion is the beginning of influence - in fact, the world never saw success without it - why don't we take a closer look at the immediate side effects Passion has on us. It's a long list of positives, but the following three emerge as the most dominant characteristics:

		(1) Unstoppable The right kind of Passion makes you unstoppable. Whereas average people easily get discouraged and resent rejection, passionate people are inspired by rejection and put forth an even greater effort. Thomas Alva Edison, the famous inventor, when asked about his many failed attempts to produce a working light bulb responded by saying: "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

"Sometimes you just gotta do whatever it is you do long enough..." There may not be anything wrong about what you're working to achieve. In fact, you may be on exactly the right path. However, time is required to prepare and mature the world around you to eventually receive and welcome what you can already see in your mind's eye, even though it's not a physical reality yet.

Passion will keep you going until you finally get the long desired thumbs up that your cause deserves. Edison pointed it out like this: "Many of life's failures are men who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up."

(2) The Real You

Passion will bring out the real you, for better or for worse. So tell me, what does a passionate person look like? Answer: Vibrant!

It usually is easier to love and adore someone that's passionate about something. They're even easier to communicate with, because they'll tend to have strong opinions. Their passion makes them come alive and it highlights how they are unique. Passion accentuates the talent inside people. Passion ignites their capacities in such a way that eyes start glowing and facial expressions display what can no longer be kept silently inside.

At this time we should also point out how Passion effectively drives away fear. Fear of being different, fear of being alone, fear of failure and maybe even the fear of fear itself, too.

(3) Spreading Effect

Passion triggers feelings in the people around us. We all know that passion or enthusiasm has the tendency to be contagious. However, let's remember that passion is much more than merely enthusiasm. We so easily think of passion as being "happiness". Passion is not a fast paced happy individual per se.

For instance, a passionate software developer does not necessarily move so much as a muscle and an officer in command may not be typified by a smiley face in the middle of a battle. Passion is energy that we can sense, but it reaches us in different ways. What we can be sure about is that (real) passion can be spotted in the surroundings of passionate people.

So what?

Would you like to be unstoppable? (Maybe not when it comes to being flat out stubborn. However, that's not what we're talking about here.) Would you like to become your best self? Would you like to have a positive effect on the people around you - excite them to action? I dare you: Find Passion and so many of your current challenges will slowly evaporate!

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

Regardless of what project you're in and no matter what your purpose or task might be, sooner or later we always end up asking ourselves: "Things are not going too well... what can I do to improve?"

I believe there are at least three basic questions we can always come back to and greatly benefit from. In my experience, every time I explore these three areas I reach new levels of understanding and conviction.

Get past that first hurdle yourself!								1) Am I passionate? What is my purpose? Do I believe in my own "mission"? Am I driven by pure desire? If I'm not, then what can I do or even adjust to reach such emotions? No passion, no change!
It takes two to tango!								2) Do I connect with others? Who among all are my key contacts and what's important to them? Does the way I interact with the people around me trigger their passion? What will it take to turn the lights on in my peers? No connection, no results!
What does your inner compass tell you?								3) What does my intuition tell me? What is the one and single most important action I could take today that would make an immediate and/or long term difference? What does my heart tell me? How can I apply my talents and my abilities to have a spreading effect? If I were to just be my best self, how would I go about making a serious difference? No intuition, no value creation!

So what?

Passion, Connection and Intuition each lead to three distinct levels of conviction. Passion leads to inner conviction. Connection leads to shared conviction and Intuition leads to discovered conviction. Here are three suggestions to how this can be applied - right now - today:

1. Increase passion by thinking
   • read inspiring literature - discover WHAT
   • then... take time to reflect and explore
   • then... take notes
   • then... make commitments and execute
2. Strengthen connection by interacting
   • spend time with inspiring people - discover WHO
   • then... take time to listen
   • then... take notes
   • then... make commitments and execute
3. Follow intuition by leaving your comfort zone
   • seek inspiring challenges and environments - discover HOW
   • then... look for opportunities
   • then... be flexible and accept the speed of the moment

And the best thing is, pick whichever area you'd like to start with. There is, however, a principle based order to these energies, as you've probably noticed: 1) ignite yourself, 2) ignite others and 3) ignite your surroundings. Try to cheat the order of this and you'll find you're up against a headwind. If you apply yourself to the process, you'll see, wind will start blowing your way.

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

Energy is real. It's the stuff that's behind everything we do and say, and that stuff is either positive or negative. There's nothing in between. It's either positive or negative. Children easily pick up energy - instantly. For example, did you ever see a child that naturally sought the company of a stranger (positive energy)? Or vice versa, did you ever experience a person that every child shuns (negative energy)? Why? It's energy and it's as real as anything. Do you believe adults are the same way? You bet'ya!

							All our senses are in sum a constant antenna. Look at the picture of the child. Even long before its ability to speak this antenna is in place and working. You can only wonder why some parents never understand nor learn that a child's inner feelings and outward behavior directly reflects the energy they themselves send out. The same goes for anyone in sales. For some it's a hard lesson learned; We're all naturally attracted to people with positive energy. That's why, if you want to influence others it all begins and ends with energy.

Most people see energy as some kind of undefined "something" beyond our own control. But there are loads of practical things we can do. Let's pinpoint a few (among millions) just to illustrate:

• regardless of pressure and stress, always get enough sleep and eat healthy food

• regardless of circumstance or people, decide to encourage and speak highly of others

• regardless of how you might feel right now, never let bad emotions influence immediate action

Many of the renowned sales gurus have created language to explain "energy" in their own words. Mahan Khalsa speaks about "intent" and "ego". Brian Tracy emphatically stresses the "psychology of selling". It doesn't matter what you call it, really. It's what comes from inside and spreads through the cracks. It makes ALL the difference!

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

Let's consider an every-day example of how energy makes all the difference while for instance raising a child or taking care of your family. Lillian and I have five children. As a family we've frequently discussed in family counsel how we'd like our mornings to be. But even though everyone puts forth an effort, with five kids ages four to twelve, there's bound to be some challenges - every single morning. How does energy apply in such a situation? And what does this have to do with sales or influence?

If I'm frustrated, irritated, impatient, tired, late or even just gradually growing angry, any one of these emotions will automatically transmit to the people around us - immediately. I may try to hide it, but really it's impossible to keep that energy inside. It all leaks out through the cracks. And we know it all too well, don't we?!

		But, you see, the trouble isn't really knowing and understanding. Remember, what's common sense isn't necessarily common practice out there... In fact, it's mostly exactly the opposite; what we know we should be doing, we often don't do. That's how it requires constant and conscious effort to stay focused on positive energy. Now, let's look at why it makes such a difference to do so.

I should be the first to admit, I don't always succeed. Reflect for a moment on what might be the elements of a typical morning for any of us...

(1) Getting up

PATH TO NEGATIVE ENERGY: When the alarm goes off, our partner gets up, but we ourselves might be tempted to just slumber a tiny bit longer. Already at this point negative feelings may start building up inside. Children jump into our bed, someone turns on the bright light or opens the curtains, we get reminders of how much there's to do today, and even when we do get up, both the toilet and shower are occupied.

PATH TO POSITIVE ENERGY: The night before we've retired early. Together with our partner we wake up before everyone else, well rested. We make our bed together and turn on pleasent music in the living room. The volume is so low you can hardly hear the music. Family members wake up with a hug and kind words. Whenever anyone does anything to trigger bad feelings we remind ourselves: "I love this person!" and we ask "I wonder how he or she feels right now / how can I be of help?"

(2) Getting breakfast

PATH TO NEGATIVE ENERGY: Everyone's hungry and looks out for their own breakfast. When someone enters the kitchen another leaves. It's usually best to be among the first to eat, because sometimes we run out of milk or even bread. The kitchen is messy from yesterday when we didn't take the time to clean it up. Sometimes there's unkind words spoken as the rush and disorganized meal causes frustration or even accidents. The youngest kids are at times alone in the kitchen, when everyone else is going back and forth trying to get ready... not smart!

PATH TO POSITIVE ENERGY: The night before the table has been set by one of the kids. Breakfast starts at seven sharp. If someone's late, nobody calls out loud for the missing person. Rather, it's an opportunity to give that someone another a hug and a compliment. Breakfast is kind of slow. Some of us are just quiet. There's time to think, to wake up and time to speak and ask questions as we check up on some of the most important upcoming events of the day. When fruit and vitamins have been swallowed we're ready for another day.

(3) Getting out the door

PATH TO NEGATIVE ENERGY: While everyone is more or less desparately scrambling together their stuff, you regularly discover that a shoe or a glove is missing. Someone's yelling for more toilet paper while others are brushing their teeth, too fast and in a hurry. Parents repeat the threatening warning everyone knows so well: "You're gonna be late for school - again!"

PATH TO POSITIVE ENERGY: "Good luck with the test today" becomes everybody's que to getting ready. The table is cleared by all in less than a minute. Someone's telling a joke as hugs and kisses are passed and the youngest kids stand waving at the door. It's tradition!

Your feelings about the others

The difference lies in how you feel about the people around you. The above mentioned path to positive energy is of course never that perfect! It rarely is. However, there are proactive elements in it that makes it much easier to keep a sincere and heartfelt smile on your face - throughout the remainder of the day.

Getting up, getting breakfast and getting out the door are all activities that repeat themselves every day. Even if you're single and alone, there's always a number of "good reasons" to quickly start tapping into negative energy right from the very start. If you do, however, you'll only generate more negativity. Why not think it through, discuss the details and decide what you want, together?

People who take control of how the day starts tend to sincerely and honestly think more positively and highly of the people around them. As a result they also find themselves surrounded by people that want to and indeed do return those positive feelings.

If energy is to work for you and not against you here's what you may want to consider: Retire early in the evening and start the next day with a conscious effort to stay tuned in on the positive, especially every time you're tempted not to.

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter

Today I'll share with you what seems to become the introduction to 3E:

Every single one of us has capacities beyond what we are aware of. Even talent and power beyond our wildest dreams. We are living receivers, bearers and channels of enormous amounts of energy. Do you believe that’s relevant to individual and team performance? Is it relevant to quality of life? It certainly is. Energy makes all the difference.

Sometimes we are placed in situations or circumstances in which we may get a glimpse of this energy. But most of our lives we hardly draw on any of those unique powers. I say hardly, but that's not entirely true. We actually make use of them all the time, but only in minor proportions to the amount of 0,1 % or much less. Yet, sometimes in brief moments we might experience pure magic. You have experienced these special moments yourself. Maybe you weren't aware of it, but all people have. It may happen in your head, in your body, together with other people or even somehow come from the outside.

Maybe the most obvious moments are when we're under extreme pressure or have to fight for our life caused by sudden danger. It is well documented that almost everything we do can in fact be multiplied by a factor of hundreds, thousands or even hundreds of thousands when we must or when motivation is focused and channeled in the same and right direction.

This book is about that power which is built into our very system as human beings. It is about what some would refer to as "being in the zone". It is about how both we ourselves and the world around us instantly can change to dramatically perform at levels we normally perceive to be impossible.

I don't expect every reader to understand what I'm going to share, but I do know - from experience - that if you want to understand I can show you on a practical level what is required to seriously increase the frequency of what people perceive as coincidence. To some, success may seem like coincidence, but when you look behind what happened you’ll always find that special ingredient - energy.

Do you want to know what's missing when things don't quite work out as you'd like it to? There's probably a number of important issues, but in my experience, energy is always among them. And believe me, it sure doesn't hurt to have a little more of it.

Follow Vidar Top at Twitter