We say "influence is energy". What does that mean?

Just think about it. What is influence?

Is it what you say to another person? Is it what the other person hears you say - or thinks you say?

Of course that's influence, but are words all?

I'd agree if you responded: "No, influence is not words alone. There's much more."

Then what else is influence? Body language, smell, sound, temperature - everything that our senses pick up..? Yes, all of that. Is there more?

Operational Influence

Oh yes, there is a lot more that influences us! MUCH more. What about internal conditions such as our self esteem and our heart? Self esteem and self worth is a powerful source of influence. Some claim thee most powerful. I don't know, but definitely crucial!

We could, however, flip the coin and consider external conditions such as myths, trends, cultures, family traditions and the laws and regulations of both our local community and national government as a whole? What about yesterday's events, the experiences and history we carry with us? Also, how important are predictions about the future and the authority of experts - or make believe capacities - to predict, prioritize and decide what's important and less important? What about physical limitations, the environment in which we live or the mind set of the people around us? What about the individual appetite or the collective craving for basic needs, or even fame and fortune for that matter? What about supply and demand, rumors, the media, branding, market positions, money, the financial market, "information" or everything the computer screen tells us in general? Do all these elements have an impact on our degree of influence?

They certainly do. All of these are highly influential factors. What we've listed so far is what we call Operational influence. Operational influence is the sum of all ramifications and circumstances in place, time and human mind set.

Everything we believe and perceive makes us "tick" a certain way. We act or react, but in total it's how we see ourselves (IDENTITY) in relation to the world (PURPOSE) that drives us. This passionate driving power therefore is what operates us and the world in which we live. It's everything around us, including ourselves and all that we have inside.

You say: Wow, that's pretty big! Yes, I'd say so too. But that's only one third of what influence is all about. There are two more important categories we need to be aware of. Together, these three form separate types of dialog.

Opinional Influence

What about the relative positions and power we have or think we may have, the knowledge we possess or wisdom we claim? Does our relationship with other people affect influence? Sure it does.

What about how others see us, our reputation and social expectations? Is there a connection between influence and how we behave in a social setting? Does our public record, informal or formal determine our power among others? How does the size of our network influence influence? What if we know some "important people in high places"? Does this leverage increased opportunity, and just how does it affect our execution of ideas and decisions? Does the way we execute in turn influence our degree of long term influence. We know it does. Our social behavior is critical to influential powers.

Let's turn it around: How do you think someone's prejudice, hurt, pain or simply bad mood affects our influence on them? And what about happiness, for that matter? All interaction is basically the exchange of opinions. Hence, this group of influence is called Opinional. Opinional influence is the sum of all feelings and emotions based on how we see ourselves, other people and the relationship we have with them. It is when heads are connected in such a way that we care more for others (SELFLESS) and the greatest value is found in simply listening (OBSERVANT).

These elements, too, are influence or sources to influence. Some people believe people are the ultimate source of influence. They're right about people being absolutely essential. What they forget, is that this is still only the second one third of what influence is all about. This type of influence deals with the human minds and how we are connected, how we exchange information and share lives and feelings. It's about experiences and retaining them as precious memories. It's about all those emotions that create a bond so foundational to how we pick up signals from each other.

Optimal Influence

What about the way we phrase a message? Is that relevant to influence? Or, what about the way we behave a message? Is behavior influence? I guess most of us have heard the statistics about how much more important body language is than words.

What about skills in asking questions? Does a talent in diplomatic ability help? What is the signal between the lines? Is there a message between the lines? If there is, how important is that message and what is it that brings it across? What place does enthusiasm have in persuasion? Is there a link between for instance the attitude with which something is communicated and the subconscious mind of the listener - how it is received, perceived and processed?

Are minor details and technicalities important to the final outcome of someone's decision? Can we exercise effective influence without doing things correctly in the eyes of another?

How does another person gain ownership to what we present them with? Should they be allowed the freedom to comment, critique or change our original proposals? What does this have to do with influence, anyway? If freedom is important, does that mean there's an element of innovation in selling? Should we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and humble in approaching another person? Why would this be significant when influencing others? What if the other person discovered we don't have all the answers? Is that influence, too, and is it smart?

A lot of the questions in this text are obviously leading and not a good example of how questions should be used in an Optimal dialog. However, I've written them to illustrate how questions quickly can become a manipulative tool. What does manipulation do with us, for that matter? Do we appreciate it? Does manipulation affect the power balance and influence? Research provides some brilliant answers and insight into this subject, but which we won't discuss here.

Perfecting our language, tactics and skills is the third and final group of elements behind influence. Since they are about optimizing our behavior and "appearance" through close interaction, this category is called Optimal. Optimal influence is the sum of all signals that peaks in desired action through another person based on discovery and conviction. It is when both parties totally abdicate their ego (OBJECTIVE) and render themselves open to intuitively discover what's better (SEEKING).

One Word to Summarize All

Each of these groups of influence builds on each other, as the diagram above illustrates. However, one is more important and foundational than the other. First comes Operational. Once the Operational influence or dialog is in place Opinional influence begins to have a powerful effect. Without the Operational dialog in place, the Opininal dialog is less effective, but still has some power. When Operational and Opinional are working as they should then Optimal influence and dialog begins to work as it should. This leads to energation.

Now, let me give you a challenge: If you were to pick one word only to describe all of this, what would it be?

Energy?!

That's what we chose! Read again and I believe you'll see why...

That's why we say "influence is energy". Yes, I believe influence is ALL about energy!